The Impossible Love of Mustafa's 'Imaan'
One thought that has stuck with me, although I don’t know where I found it or who gifted it to me, is that if something is free of contradictions it is unlikely to be close to some kind of truth. In the video for ‘Imaan’ by Mustafa, we see the poet and the muse (the model and feminist activist Imaan Hammam) try out different poses, clothing, roles that could make them feel more comfortable in this world. The lyrics suggest a Montagues-and-Capulets-like situation, a context of impossible love that cannot hold back the kind of longing that feels like a personal fate.
Lyrics:
Imaan,
I’m standing here
by your work place
hoping that you’re there
I’m wearing the things you said
on my face
like they’re a prayer
you left me on a tight rope
between God and your father
& there’s not enough air
I know that you can’t hold me
but just hold me, in someway,
like you want me,
like you lost me,
I know
(Chorus)
what I feel, I feel alone
Imaan, you’re grown
you can leave if you want
there is nowhere for me to go
Imaan, you hold
everything in your palm
Imaan
You say praying isn’t easy
and all the ways you need me
are from God
and all the ways you reach him are flawed
I know our families would never find their way
to the same living room,
all of these bloodlines, all of these costumes
I know that you can’t hold me
but just hold me
like you want me
like you got me
(Chorus)
Oh what I feel, I feel alone
Imaan, you’re grown
you can leave if you want
there is nowhere for me to go
Imaan, you hold
everything, everything, everything, everything
everything, everything